We're trying to figure out what all the fuss is about, why countless celebrities own hundreds of these ugly bags that you have to be put on a waiting list for, and all we could come up with is a bunch of reasons why you shouldn't own a Birkin. 1. It's $9,000-$34,000 (other sources say even more) 2. You're a huge target for robbers 3. There's about 2983402834092835 better bags you could buy for cheaper (Valentino Rose Tote, Chanel Chain Length Purse) 4. It's over-rated, purchased purely as a status symbol, not a style symbol 5. You can't order one online, and what's the point of shopping if you can't do it online 6. You have to wait two years for it, in which time no one will want one anymore because a) the world will be completely bankrupt and b) after this ten goes up, no one will care about Birkin anymore (hahah) 7. If the recession lasts any longer, people will look at you like you're an idiot 8. You can never use a coat check again (see 2) 9. Lets face it, can you even pronounce Hermes? 10. Heidi Montag has one -- Tell us what your favorite bag is, as long as it's not the Birkin.